LIFE COACHING EXPLAINED

If you have been wondering what life coaching is, here is the answer. Imagine a situation where you felt stuck not knowing where or how to start something say a business project that you dearly want to do. Then, some one comes along and gives you some suggestions on how to go about it. You get the answers and ideas you were looking for. You put the ideas into action and your business is born.

Another example could be, if you have been struggling with weight loss. Your friend or someone at the gym gives you an idea about a successful weight loss program to combine it with your gym training. You try it. Three months down the line you starting seeing results. Then you realize how close the answer to your situation was.

Life coaching therefore is a technique that supports people explore their current situations, intentions, aspirations and find answers that help them resolve their identified situations.

It is a means of facilitating personal development through an exploration and challenging current beliefs, practices, and situations in an individual’s life.

It is about exploring that individual map, that people create in their lives to inform their way daily life activities. Life coaching examines the importance and meanings that people give to various events in their lives as well as how these events affect their quality of life.

Life coaching is client directed with professional life coaches using person centered and strength-based approaches to help clients achieve goals.

What do life coaches do?

Life coaches help clients achieve goals in their lives by helping them resolve issues that have been keeping them from progressing. The process pays attention to where client is at present and where they want to be in the future. For example a business person who presently feels that they are not making money as they should and would like to increase their sales. A sales coach will work with them to explore ways in which the client can find answers to increase their sales.

A brief history of life coaching

Life coaching is believed to have originated from America in late 1980s by a man named Thomas Leornard. He believed people were not broken but were full of potential and had the possibility for personal transformation. Life coaching then bridged the gap between psychology and psychoanalysis.

Life coaching is not therapy and does not treat mental health issues or prescribe therapies.

What is the difference between Life Coaching and therapy:

Therapy/counseling: Patients have past trauma or incidences to deal with. Clients of coaching typically have not experienced any form of trauma in the past.

Therapists and counselors examine a client’s past to find solutions for present situations. Coaching clients focus on the present to improve on their future.

Therapist and counselors focus on diagnosing mental health concerns that people experience. Coaching does not. A coach once identified, a life coach can refer situations/cases as needed.

Therapist/counselors; prescribe therapies or some medication for treatment whereas a typical Life Coach do not prescribe therapies.

Mentoring:

Mentors focus specific jobs, tasks pr processes. Life Coaching relatively uses holistic approach to client situations.

They are more of relationship focused form of a guidance whereas coaching is not relational but professionally done.

Mentors are more of experts in a certain field, and they work like teaching. Coaching is facilitated, does not teach but guide clients into exploring and resolving their own issues.

Types of coaching.

There are various types of life coaching. Life coaching include Mindset coaching, Career Coaching, Health coaching, communication coaching, relationship coaching among many more.

Let us look at Mindset Coaching

Mindset coaching help clients challenge own opinions and beliefs that hold them back from progress.

This is an area that I have skill, experience, and knowledge in. In my positive mindset practice, I propose and encourage three things, that I have used and have been successful for me:

1. Self-reflection: This is about taking time to intensely think and assess your thoughts, beliefs, desires, motivation, and view about life. What are your feelings about your current situation? It is about thinking about your feeling and asking yourself such questions as, why am I this way? What are my values, believes and attitudes towards the world around me?

• Self-acceptance: It about asking deep self-discovery questions. Who really are you? Do your belief in the person you currently are?  If not, what can you do to change or improve on that is keeping you from progress or do you just want to keep things at status quo?

• Self-actualization: Once you have done self-reflection, arrived at self-acceptance, you will realize that self-actualization is key. It is about celebrating your achievements. A place of celebrating your personal potential. 

Are you feeling stuck or feeling disappointed in your current situation, want to explore yourself further or want to change direction in your life or even just wanting to make changes to the situation? You are at the right place. I use person centred and strength based coaching practice where I help you develop ways to change the course of your situation through helping you to challenge your beliefs, build new mental skills and create good outcomes for yourself.

Just like life, we are unique and individual in who we are. People are in various stages that they need change in their lives.

 Chebo Positive Mindset Coaching is here to support you in every way that you want your life to take. It can be change in your professional or personal lives. As a positive mindset, I help people develop and keep a productive thinking.

It is a person centred and strength based coaching practice where I help you develop ways to change the course of your thinking, support you to challenge your current beliefs, build new mental skills and create good outcomes for yourself. It can be in your professional or personal life. As a positive Mindset coach, I will work with you to reinforce positive thoughts that foster growth.

What is self-acceptance mindset?

The opposite of self-acceptance is self-rejection, Lack of self-acceptance makes us vulnerable to criticism. It holds us back in almost every aspect of outlives.

Whereas people with high self-acceptance are more likely to be tolerant to criticism and always continue to improve in aspects of their lives.

So, what is self- acceptance and why are some people more self-accepting than others?

Self-acceptance: It is accepting ourselves as who we really are, we are regardless of our flaws. It means deeply and completely accepting ourselves unconditionally and without doubt or exception.

why are some people more self-accepting than others?

People vary when it comes to self-acceptance. Some are more self-accepting while other people struggle. Research puts this to a person’s psychological, social, and biological factors.

Research states that people who have been brought in a more caring and valuing environment are more likely to adopt a higher self-acceptance ability than those people brought up under unstable parental environment. They are more likely to withstand external criticism and judgement.

Our society also play a role in individual self-acceptance. Research indicate that people brought under cultures that give emphasis to individuality and self- expression are more likely to accept themselves compared to those whose cultures and norms promoted conformity.

I also strongly belief that we have innate resilience to overcome our situations in the face of  strong normative cultures or low supportive relationships. I belief that, some situations can change our life trajectories by strengthening our self determination through positive happenings.

A case scenario-true story: When I was young, about 15 years about to join high school, my father could not afford to pay for my school fees. I had to work at my stepbrother’s house looking after his children during school holidays so that he can pay my schools fees. Although my brother then was working in a prestigious government office, I reported to school every opening day with little. I used to tell myself that maybe my brother didn’t have enough money to cover both my school fees and buying me luxurious things like biscuits and dry food that other children brought with them to school.

I always dreaded school opening days. It made me feel ashamed of myself because other children did not belief me and called me a liar when told them that I lived with my brother in Nairobi. I looked more of a child from the remotest part of Kenya not one from the capital city of Kenya, and not even that one to be associated with my then popular stepbrother. Nobody believed me when I said I was a stepsister of my brother. He was well known and worked in one of the powerful government offices then. Children said that I was a cheat, an imposter, or a wannabe.

I didn’t have pocket money, had one pair of bedding. My school was in an area where the weather was always cold and wet. When it rained, other children from Nairobi had raincoats, hot water bottles and umbrellas, I doubled up my school cardigan and braced the cold. When other children were visited during mid term visits, no one came to see me.

I didn’t have many friends to hang out with except for my one friend Vivian who stood by me. I spent most of my time reading and threw my weight behind my studies. When I topped in my class one time, I got motivated. It lifted my self-esteem. Children started to respect me. With time, I accepted myself, my situation. I told myself that my studies will get me where I want to be. I believed that after school, I will get a job, earn salary, and live the life I want.

I appreciated my brother’s ability to pay for my school fees. I visualize myself speaking in boardroom spaces, influencing policies that provide for poor families. I developed a thick skin against ridicule and bullying at school. Today, looking back, I am grateful for accepting who I am. If I had accepted self-doubt, I would not be where I am today. THE POWER OF SELF-ACCEPTANCE IS HUGE!